I despise goodbyes (because I've said so many and I know the long road that entails afterwards), that's why I choose to think of them as cya later. This morning Adam got on the plane to head back to Afghanistan to finish out this deployment. I didn't think I would cry because there are only a few more months left and the "rough" part of this deployment is over. I was mistaken. I did good when we dropped the boys off at school and they said goodbye to Daddy. Then we headed home and he packed up his last minute stuff. After that, we headed to a local diner for breakfast. His was in his uniform at this point and the waitress was asking him about what he does and where he was headed. She meant well when she said "Come home safely," but that about did me in with the type of deployment this one has been. I didn't talk much during breakfast, I was trying unsuccessful to hold the tears back. I don't know how I managed to eat but I did eat some.
There was a World War II Veteran that served in the Navy sitting in the booth next to us that told us stories and chatted Adam up while I tried unsuccessfully to maintain my composure. May I just say I'm not to much for public display of emotion so the whole thing was kind of embarrassing for me. And on top of it, I kind of felt bad for the waitress, who told me I needed to stop crying or she was going to cry too and she couldn't work if she was crying. I've been a waitress and it's pretty much impossible to wait tables when you are emotional. Anyways, the Veteran kept an ongoing conversation going with Adam about his service and his son's service who is in the Air force. Then he thanked us (mainly Adam) for the conversation and wished Adam well and headed to start the rest of his day. About five minutes after he left another older guy came through the door, took in the situation, with my red eyes and wet napkins and seated himself in the front booth of us. He waited until I was somewhat composed (this being the best I could do) and then approached us, asked about Adam's service, and thanked him for his service; then he stated that he knows he doesn't get thanked enough for what he does, took our tap to pay for, and told us God bless. It was nice to hear someone thank Adam for his service and it didn't even bother me that he didn't acknowledge me and our family's sacrifice because I was to busy trying to hold together some composure.
Anyways, after that we headed to the airport. I was going to park and walk him to his plane but by this point I'm pretty much bawling, forget about the composure! So instead of walking him in and sending him off with a smile I gave him a hug and kiss through the crying and waved goodbye as he walked into the airport. I did not want to cry my eyes out in front of whoever was at the airport!
Then after all that I did the only thing I knew to do and went for some retail therapy! And oddly enough, the rest of the day has gone okay. I miss my man but I know he'll be home for good soon. And I'm extremely grateful for the time we had together as a family. I also know that there are fourteen Oklahomans that won't be making it back to their family and friends after this deployment is over and I can't fathom walking through that heartache so I do one of the only things I know to do and try and appreciate the time I've been given with my love ones. Sleep well world and be safe my love.
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