Two Months and Still Going

   Well, I changed my mind, I was going to continue blogging through reintergration and then reality happened and I decided to take some time for me and mine and walk through the transtion without sharing it with the world. We are finally at a place that we have a new routine for our family with work and school. The boys just got out of school for the summer and we kicked the summer off with a family visit to Branson to celebrate summer and my mother-in-laws birthday. So thankful to have my hubby back and helping out with things around the house and also to just have an adult to hang out with again. Hope everyone else is enjoying their summer.

He's Home!

   My hubby is home! He got home this past Friday. The welcome home ceremony was full of so many emotions, of course excitement that he was home, anticipation to get our reunion started, and also honor and grief for the soldiers that were lost this deployment and their family and friends. My hubby's Mom and her boyfriend came, along with Adam's best friend, Steven, and his wife, and then of course the boys and I. This was the first welcome home ceremony that the boys came too. They did really good. Nathan's smile was from ear to ear when he first saw Daddy and Jacob just kept taking pictures with his phone that he uses to play games. We are so glad to be back together as a family and are taking the reintegration transition one step at a time.

Spring Break and Reunion is Coming!

   I took some time off blogging over Spring Break. I needed a break. My sister's family came to visit from Pa for Spring Break. It was a lot of fun. Unfortunately, it rained almost the whole time that her family was here but we stayed busy with inside activities and even made it to the zoo on the one dry day they were here. It's nice to be able to spend time with family.
They left early Friday morning and about the same time I found out that my hubby is back in the USA! Can't tell you how excited we are as a family that this time is finally here! Only a few more days and we will be a complete family again!

Whew what a week!

   It's been a crazy, busy, and productive week. I'm also anxiously awaiting for my sister and her family to arrive tomorrow evening to officially kick off Spring Break with them. Then my hubby is coming this direction soon so I've got lots to anticipate over the next couple of weeks. This evening the boys had their first t ball practice for this spring. I'm so glad that they are on the same team this year, less practices and games for Mommy. Jacob really enjoyed getting out there and playing with the older boys too. Last year it was hit or miss for him so I'm hoping he continues to enjoy it this year. He's already asking to play soccer and football. I told him Mommy is too busy, one thing at a time. Besides, Daddy will be home soon so then he gets to take it up with him. I'm going off Mommy duty for a little bit when Daddy comes home to let him experience a bit of what our lives has been like while he's been gone the last year.

Homecoming and Grieve

   This really isn't my post to write but I feel it needs to be said and I'm not one to keep my mouth shut when I think something needs to be said so here it goes... I'm just as excited as all the other wives and family members that our service members are coming home, especially my hubby! It's been quite the year. However, there is a whole different reality that this deployment has brought with it that the other two I've experienced haven't and that's the loss of life that our guys and us family members have experienced. I've been seeing all these homecoming pictures online. Yes, they make me smile, cry, or just think happy thoughts, depending on the day and mood. It also makes me anxious and excited for my own homecoming with my hubby soon. The boys and I are definitely counting down the days.
   However, the other side of the story is that at these homecomings there are 14 pictures of the men and woman that we lost overseas this deployment. Yes, they deserve this honor, and so do the families that have to find a way to go on with their lives. It just makes me sad for them because I can't even imagine the process that they are facing and I know words will never be adequate but my thoughts and prayers go out to the widows and family members that are only beginning this journey.

The Picture Perfect Vs Reality

   I just got done watching The Bachelor. Yes, I enjoy this show and The Baccalaureate but the truth is most of those relationships don't end up together because it simply isn't reality. They set you up on amazing and once in a life time opportunity dates and then they come back to the mundane of life and have to figure out how their relationship is going to work and stay strong. Plus, they go through some grueling media publicity that drags them through the mud. It can make them stronger but the going is initially hard.
   The reality of my life is being a Mom, work, being a wife, trying to maintain and grow in my relationship with God. The daily things matter because they are what end up shaping the journey.

Spring Forward

   Loosing an hour of sleep is not one of my favorite things. I set my alarm clock this morning to make sure I got up for church but I turned it off and barely woke up in time to rush out the door to make it to church. The boys got breakfast bars and I got coffee at church. We got to church and I realized Jacob had his buttons done wrong, I corrected Nathan's before we left for church. Nathan also wore his new Sunday shoes I bought him but forgot to wear socks with them. And then when I went back out to my car after dropping Jacob off at Sunday school and to get Nathan settled into his class one of my doors was wide open. Whew, we made it, with more caffeine for Mommy throughout the day, but we did make it. Hope everyone else had a good day.

Homecoming Outfit Strike Out

   So tonight I went shopping with another army wife. The whole idea was to get a homecoming outfit for the welcome home ceremony that is fast approaching. I didn't find anything that I like so I'm not sure what I'm going to end up wearing. However, we did get new swim suites ad we enjoyed getting to catch up with each other.

Girl's Night

   Tonight I got to hang out with one of my girl friends. We went out for a quick bite to eat and then to see The Vow. I thought it was a cute movie. Nice to take a break after a full week.

Sister Time :)

   This evening my sister and I scrapbooked together via Skype. This way we get to catch up some and we get to work on our pictures of our families. I've scrapbooked since my youngest son was born, who is going to be seven in May. My sister got into scrapbooking when her daughter was born, who is three and a half. Last deployment (which is the scrapbook I'm still working on finishing) my hubby was in Iraq and I moved back home to Pennsylvania. It was a good decision for that season of my life. It was great to be able to hang out with my family and friends again. Anyways, it gave my sister and I an opportunity to hang out more and get some sister time in. She had her daughter about two months before Adam came back from his deployment and we moved back to Oklahoma. So yes, I took tons of pictures, I wanted Adam to be able to experience some of what was going on in our life and I knew being back in Pa was a season of our lives.
   My sister and I got together a few times to scrapbook when I lived there. When the deployment was over and I moved back to Oklahoma we made a pact to continue scrapbooking together via Skype. Have I mentioned I love Skype! It's helped keep me and the boys connected to Adam throughout the three deployments we have experienced too. So now I don't have to leave Adam at home with the boys, or get a babysitter for a night out, I simply hop online after the boys are tucked in for the night and pull my laptop out and scrapbooking supplies and wallah! Good times and it doesn't even cost either of us money for some good old quality sister time :)

Today was a better day :)

   Yesterday was a rough day, today was much better. I'm thankful to have the chance to regroup and start over fresh in the morning. There, I guess I have found something positive about the mornings. Other than that, I'm usually trying to drag myself out of bed and get the kids to school and me to work on time.  

Whew, What a Day!

   Today was crazy, busy, and productive day. I will not go into all the details but I am beyond grateful for some great friends and my sister that lent me a listening ear to vent some frustrations. I'm so glad that I don't have to do this life journey alone even when I can't just pick up the phone and call my man.

Back to Work

   Busy day at work. Ready to have a good week. Every day this month makes it one day closer to having my love back with me. :)

Extraordinary Women Conference

   This weekend is the Extraordinary Women Conference. Check out this music video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKSQjSdU8VA. I'm thankful that God works through my imperfections. Today was a beautiful day for multiple reasons :) Looking forward to hearing some more wonderful speakers tomorrow.

Power of attorney

   So today I had to use my power of attorney to refinance our house. Paperwork and more paperwork, thankfully that is over and done with. Tomorrow is another full day so I'm headed to bed to get some more sleep.

Leap Year

   So this year has to be leap year with one extra day in February. I could do without it if it would bring my hubby home one day sooner. Hopefully within the month he'll be home. Now if the days would just stop dragging. At least I know the boys and work will keep me busy. There is always plenty of things to do, it's just finding the motivation to do it.

One Year

   Today marks one year since our family has been apart. In the last year we have been together twenty five days. Thankfully this will all soon be over. I spent the day busy with work and home stuff.

Being Intentional

   So I got a Valentine's card from my hubby yesterday. He wrote it on Valentines and it finally arrived here yesterday. It was very sweet and unexpected. It made me smile and think of him.
   Okay so the point of this post is that I've learned to be very intentional with my time. My job of being a therapist at an elementary school being a mother to my two boys, as well as being an army wife makes me realize just have much I have vying for my attention and time. I've learned that if I can get it done now instead of waiting until another day to just do it and get it done with, such as paying a bill that just came in the mail. I've also learned to try and schedule one fun thing for the weekend but to keep the rest of it guarded for family time and the weekly task of getting my house in order. I've also learned through being intentional with my time, just how much I really have on my plate and am once again looking at ways to cut back on my time commitments so I can be more effective in what I do give my time and talents in, anyways just wanted to share what I'm currently learning and trying to walk in. Hope everyone has a good week.

Little Boys Want to Be Like Their Daddy

   So my youngest son is all into the army thing right now. He is five and is in prekindergarten. I gave him a choice of two shirts to wear today and he wanted the army shirt (which wasn't even an option to start with). I let him wear it, no big deal. Then on the way home he says "I'm going to be an army man". Him and his brother have talked about what they want to be when they grow up quite a bit in the last several months. My oldest thinks he wants to be a teacher and has been pretty consistent in that. However, my younger son has changed his mind several times. First, he wanted to be a police officer, then an army man, and then a counselor. Now he's decided he wants to be an army man and be a counselor the rest of the time when he's not being an army man.
   I've not made it a big secret that I do not want my sons to be in the military. I feel like they and our family have given enough and that they don't need to be involved in the military world personally as they get older. I fully support my husband in his decision to be in the military but there is just something about thinking about my babies growing up and joining the army, or any branch of the military that does not sit well with me. Now I hope that I will be big enough to support my sons in whatever they decide to do career wise and more importantly with their life as they continue to grow. After all it's my job to help shape them, but then I have to let go of control, and let them go. Thankfully for me, the army thing, even if it happens is a long ways off so I'll cross my fingers that my son changes his mind once more.

Put on the Spot

  I had my yearly work evaluation today. It went well but it made me a little bit anxious. I do not like to be put on the spot. My thing is finding the balance in being humble but also being aware of my strengths and weaknesses. I'm glad that's over for another year.

Hurtful Words

   Words really are powerful. People have said some very encouraging things to me during this deployment!
"I'm praying for you."
 "I'll watch the boys for you if you need a night off".
 "How are you hanging in there?"
Then there are the other words that are just plain hurtful, whether it's intended or not.
"You knew what you were getting into when you married an army guy."
"Just think more positively."
"A national guard wife is a guard wife, not an army wife."
Words can either help lift people up or tear them down. Think before you speak, I've been known to speak without thinking but I can tell you as an army wife there has been a lot of thought that has gone into our lifestyle choice. However, that doesn't make it easy, there are some huge sacrifices that come with it. I know I also have a choice on how to react to these words that are spoken into my life I just wish sometimes that people would adhere to the wise old adage of "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

Four Day Weekend

   Today was church and then I took the boys to the park for a little bit. It was just to nice not to spend some time outside. Glad to have four days off and enjoying it.

Crazy Day

   Today was a Birthday party for one of the boys friends. After the birthday party, we ran some errands. Nathan really wanted to stop by the library and pick up some new books to read so we did, and we needed groceries so we took care of that too. Then we came home and my garage door got stuck, it wouldn't go back down, so I called up my friend and had him come look at it. Moments like these make me feel kind of helpless and overwhelmed. I'm so ready for this deployment to be over and it's so close to being there but oh so far away. Missing my hubby, and wishing he was closer than he is right now. However, thankful for helpful friends.

Taking the Day Off to Clean

   Last week I worked two days because Adam left on Wednesday to head back overseas. This week ended up being a three day week because we had a snow day on Monday and today was a professional training day for the teachers. It's kind of nice how it's worked to slowly get back into work but things are busy as usual at the job. Monday I enjoyed making a snowman with Jacob. Today I took the day and cleaned my house, going through my room and organizing, and doing laundry. Jacob got to relax, watch TV (netflix), and play the wii.
   This evening I went out with the small group ladies for a night out. We had some yummy enchiladas that one of the ladies made and then we went out to cheesecake factory for dessert. Yummy! The boys hung out with Adam's best friend and his son so they got a boys day in :) Looking forward to the rest of the weekend.

The Past and the Present Collide

   This morning and afternoon I spent time at a yellow ribbon ceremony learning about homecoming information. So excited that we are at this part of the deployment. This evening I went with some friends to an alumni basketball game at ORU. I can't remember the last time I was back on campus, I'll have to take a trip there again sometime soon to get some shirts for the boys and I.

Night Off

   Today was a pretty good day. The work day was pretty hectic but that is pretty typical these days. This evening I went out with a friend for dinner and a movie. We saw Joyful Noise, lots of good singing. It was nice to take the night off and relax. The boys got to play at their friends' house with a bunch of other kids from church. This weekend is shaping up to be a busy one.

Getting Back in the Groove

   Today I went back to work, then hit the gym, and finally got to spend some quality time with my small group from church. It was a busy day. It was nice to go back to our "normal" routine for this phase of the deployment.

Saying Goodbye Again (Cya Later)

   I despise goodbyes (because I've said so many and I know the long road that entails afterwards), that's why I choose to think of them as cya later. This morning Adam got on the plane to head back to Afghanistan to finish out this deployment. I didn't think I would cry because there are only a few more months left and the "rough" part of this deployment is over. I was mistaken. I did good when we dropped the boys off at school and they said goodbye to Daddy. Then we headed home and he packed up his last minute stuff. After that, we headed to a local diner for breakfast. His was in his uniform at this point and the waitress was asking him about what he does and where he was headed. She meant well when she said "Come home safely," but that about did me in with the type of deployment this one has been. I didn't talk much during breakfast, I was trying unsuccessful to hold the tears back. I don't know how I managed to eat but I did eat some.
   There was a World War II Veteran that served in the Navy sitting in the booth next to us that told us stories and chatted Adam up while I tried unsuccessfully to maintain my composure. May I just say I'm not to much for public display of emotion so the whole thing was kind of embarrassing for me. And on top of it, I kind of felt bad for the waitress, who told me I needed to stop crying or she was going to cry too and she couldn't work if she was crying. I've been a waitress and it's pretty much impossible to wait tables when you are emotional. Anyways, the Veteran kept an ongoing conversation going with Adam about his service and his son's service who is in the Air force. Then he thanked us (mainly Adam) for the conversation and wished Adam well and headed to start the rest of his day. About five minutes after he left another older guy came through the door, took in the situation, with my red eyes and wet napkins and seated himself in the front booth of us. He waited until I was somewhat composed (this being the best I could do) and then approached us, asked about Adam's service, and thanked him for his service; then he stated that he knows he doesn't get thanked enough for what he does, took our tap to pay for, and told us God bless. It was nice to hear someone thank Adam for his service and it didn't even bother me that he didn't acknowledge me and our family's sacrifice because I was to busy trying to hold together some composure.
   Anyways, after that we headed to the airport. I was going to park and walk him to his plane but by this point I'm pretty much bawling, forget about the composure! So instead of walking him in and sending him off with a smile I gave him a hug and kiss through the crying and waved goodbye as he walked into the airport. I did not want to cry my eyes out in front of whoever was at the airport!
   Then after all that I did the only thing I knew to do and went for some retail therapy! And oddly enough, the rest of the day has gone okay. I miss my man but I know he'll be home for good soon. And I'm extremely grateful for the time we had together as a family. I also know that there are fourteen Oklahomans that won't be making it back to their family and friends after this deployment is over and I can't fathom walking through that heartache so I do one of the only things I know to do and try and appreciate the time I've been given with my love ones. Sleep well world and be safe my love.

R & R

   I haven't been updating my blog in the last two week because my husband has been home on his R&R. We have a few more days together as a family and then he heads back for a couple more months before this deployment is officially accomplished. I took a break from blogging for several reasons. One of the main reason being I wanted to enjoy this time privately with my family. This is the first leave we've gotten in the three oversea deployments that we've experienced as a couple. The first deployment we were dating/engaged.
   This leave kept getting pushed back and cancelled and it was at the point that we had just chalked up that we weren't going to get leave. However, we have finally gotten it and I'm grateful that we have had this time as a family even though it's going to be hard to send him back in a few days. Mainly we've done a little bit of everything. Adam has been ransacking the house, clearing through stuff, and decluttering. One of his first days home he had the carpet cleaning people out cleaning our carpets. While it's been nice to clean and sort through the boys toys at times it's been a bit much for me. He's taken over the house and our routine which has taken adjustment, as sure as it will take adjustment to him being gone again, and then almost as soon as we get adjusted he'll be back for good since he got his leave so late in the deployment.
   Some of my favorite moments of this deployment were 1) our family vacation that we took for a few days to just get away from everything, 2) getting our family pictures done, 3) and getting to go to dinner and a concert with our friends. It's also been great to spend time together just chilling as a family. It's even been nice having him tackling the things around the house that I've just let go because he normally takes care of it and I didn't have the time or motivation to deal with (like the clutter in the garage).
   Mainly I'm just thankful to have him here. I think it worked out for him to get his leave at the perfect time for our family. It'll be interesting to transition once more for all of us again but our life is one of transitions so we are pretty use to them as a family.

Anticipation

Waiting, waiting, and waiting. I just found out my hubby's headed this direction for his leave. The waiting seems to be dragging on but excited that he's heading this way and just trying to get things done so I can hang out with him while he's here.

Visiting

   Today was a good day to sit and visit. This morning the boys and I took it easy. Then I went to a baby shower for another army wife. After that I met up with another one of my friends that just relocated back to the area, yet another army wife. After that I came home and visited with my mother-in-law who babysat the boys for me this afternoon. And then another one of my friends from college stopped by for a little bit so we sat and talked, It was a refreshing, relaxing, and fun kind of day.

I got the best news

   I'm not saying but I will say I'm very excited. I'm looking forward to this upcoming weekend. I had a good evening too, hanging out with some kiddos and relaxing.

Long Day

   Today was a good day but a long day. I had an unusual fitful sleep last night and started the day off at six. I didn't get home until nine this evening. Thankfully, it was a good day and I got to text back and forth with my hubby some. That was comforting for several different reasons. I'm thankful tomorrow is Friday and I'm also thankful for all the people that have helped me out countless times this deployment. One of these days I'm going to make a list and I'd probably leave out some unintentionally anyways. For all my moodiness about others not understanding and sometimes not caring (because they are living in their own worlds), aren't we all more or less, there really have been people that have reached out to the boys and me in little and big ways this deployment.
   Anyways, with all that said, for the last thirty minutes I've been sitting here and listening to songs from other army wives deployment play list. I've been meaning to put one of these together and haven't. But this is the one I like the most out of them all and the first time I heard it was tonight.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DluELMLYdlA

What Would I Do Without My Friends?

   So glad I have some great friends. Thankful for my army wife friends. Also, thankful for my church friends, and my amazing co-workers. I'm just thankful I don't have to do it all on my own, even when my hubby is far away.

Every Week Needs to be a Four Day Week

   Rest creates miracles! Yesterday I got the housework and laundry done after being away for Saturday and part of Sunday. I got a lot done at work today and have decided that every week needs to be a four day week :) If only I could make that happen. Well, I've got some ideas that I'm looking into.

Ready for this to be over!

   Only two and a half more months but I'm so over this! Ready for Adam to be home but worried about reintegration too. Ugh! Guess I'll just focus on what I can control for now. Glad to have the day off but ready to tackle the rest of the week.

Weekend Get Away

   I enjoyed my weekend away with some other army wives. Shopping at the Outlets, eating, and some good socialization. Thanks to my mother-in-law who watched the boys. Only two and a half more months to go! Yea! And I don't have to work tomorrow :)

Finishing the Week off Strong

   I had a good and productive day at work. This weekend I'm taking a break with some other army wives. I'm looking forward to some fun and relaxing time, along with some shopping. Time for some quality girl time :)

Productive Day

   Today was a good day. I got a bunch done at work, made tacos for dinner for the boys and I, and then rested and relaxed with my boys. I briefly got to talk with my hubby again today so overall a good day.

Taking a Break

   The last couple of days I needed a break. I was feeling a little overwhelmed by life. I literally went to bed as soon as I put the boys to bed last night and slept until my alarm clock went off this morning. I also had a great supervision meeting so now I'm ready to tackle the rest of this deployment and finish it off strong. It also helped that my hubby called me yesterday and we got to talk for almost twenty minutes. I'm pretty sure that's the longest we've talked since he's been gone and it's been almost two months since I talked to him on the phone. It was actually kind of strange to be able to talk to him but nice at the same time.

What a day!

   Nothing exciting to report! We went to church this morning which was nice because it was kind of like being back home. It'd almost been a month since we'd been there due to our sickness before our vacation. When we were in Pa we visited the church we went to during the last deployment and it was nice to visit even though there were a lot of changes (kind of the way life goes), it's so nice to be back at our home church.
The rest of the day was finishing up house work and going grocery shopping along with some relaxation and even getting some paperwork done for my job. I may not be able to get all the paperwork done at once but I'm going to keep at it (and also try not to get overwhelmed in the process), just like my life at the moment. So ready for this deployment to be over! On one hand, two to three months seems doable, but on the other, it seems never ending. One day at a time, and one foot in front of the other.

Spontaneous

   Sometimes spontaneity is a good thing. Today was a lazy Saturday. Some of our friends asked us to go the zoo so we enjoyed the nice weather and took some time out to relax together.

Friday Night Relaxation

   Yea for Friday nights! Relaxation with the boys and a friend to celebrate her birthday. One of the positive things about deployments is I spend more time with my friends. Glad I have people to share life with during these times.

Back to Work

   Back to work I went today. It was busy and there is plenty of things today. It was nice to be back but now I have to get use to the morning routine and the work week again.

New Year Resolutions 2012

 Okay, so I rather like the resolutions. Last year I did a blog about them almost two weeks into January and I actually sticked with them throughout the year. So here's a recap of my 2011 goals.

Resolutions!

Now that I am almost two weeks late on this I've decided to write out my resolutions.

1) Blog Daily
I've already mentioned this is an outlet for me and gets me away from my other life tasks. I hope that this blog also starts conversation with others.

2) Work Out 3-5 Times a Week
I hate the way American society is so hung up on the way they look but for this season of my life I've decided I want to be healthier. I also love the feeling of sweat, knowing that I'm getting healthier is actually a good feeling. Plus it's a great stress reliever.

3) Simplify My Life
I haven't decided exactly what this means. I just know I decide to do everything and get stressed out so I am trying to cut back on my activities and follow some kind of schedule yet with flexibility in it. So for now my objectives to this resolution is
a) make freezer meals at least 1-2 times monthly
b) make crock pot meals 1-2 times weekly
This will at least make dinners easier at home easier after working and exercising.

 

Now on to my goals for 2012.

1) Finish this deployment out strong.

     a) daily devotions.

     b) continued communication with Adam (weekly emails)

2) Continue to teach the boys responsibility.

     a) putting their laundry away

     b) cleaning up their toys

     c) taking responsibility for their own actions

3) Keep current with my paperwork for my job. More difficult than stated.

    a) daily paperwork

4) Enjoy family time when Adam gets back, even with reintergration and everything.

5) Learn to relax and not fill up my time with to do lists.

6) Find joy in the small things.

7) Take a photography course.

I realize some of these goals are vague but it's all I've got right now so this is where I'm starting from and I might add on if I want throughout the year.

Home :)

   I just got home. We had a pretty smooth drive today and I'm just thankful to be home. Now to go back to work and school tomorrow.

Snow, Anger, and Prayer

   The drive to Pa was nice weather and pretty smooth except for Nathan being sick. I can not say the same for the drive back to Ok. I fought snow for at least four hours on my twelve hour drive today. I do not like to drive in snow. Adam doesn't mind it, I think he even relishes the challenge but I'd be happy to avoid it all together. I was angry that he isn't here to drive through it for me or at least with me.
   So I put prayers to work on my drive today. I saw at least six cars that were on the side of the road for accidents. I sent up prayers for them and kept pushing through. So we have made it halfway and have another halfway to go.

A start to the New Year

   Welcome to 2012. We started the year with our family in Pa and will most likely end 2012 with them too. We will see, time will tell. I'm thankful for the time we got to spend with family and friends here. I'm also ready to head back to Ok and be at our home and get back into our routine. We've got a few more things to look forward to until Adam rejoins our family again in the end of March hopefully.
   I know I started this blog as a 365 day blog for one year of deployment but the honest statement is this deployment isn't over and I feel like we've got more to say so I'll most likely continue through the end of this deployment into reunification and reintergration.